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One of the worst things that can happen when you text a girl is when she doesn’t text back.
And… you don’t hear from her for a long~ time.
Especially when you feel things are going well with her, this sudden setback can hurt like a knockout punch coming from below straight to your chin.
And–sends your mind spinning out of control.
You can start to question the creation of the universe like some lonely chap in his parent’s basement.
But, I’m guessing you are asking something similar to the following:
- Is texting a simple message that hard?
- Why is she not responding to me?
- What does this mean?
- Why did she stop texting?
- Why is she not texting back yet?
- What’s taking her so long?
- Why is this driving me crazy?
- Is she busy, or is she not interested?
- What should I do?
- How long do I have to wait before I text her again?
- What do I even text her? What do I say?
If these questions are starting to give you a splitting headache, you can take it easy now. Why? Because the answers to your questions are just a couple of scrolls away.
I’ve got answers for you below.
Let’s start with something you most likely won’t be thinking about when you feel like a girl is ignoring your text messages.
In this article:
What NOT to do when she doesn’t text back
I know it can be pretty nerve-wracking waiting for a reply from a girl you like.
You wait and wait; days go by.
And yet, she leaves you without any response to your last text message.
That can seriously hurt.
It can feel like getting punched in the gut, and you suffer a blow to your self-esteem. So–and this is critical–don’t take things personally, because you’re only going to end up upsetting yourself.
I want you to keep this in mind:
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One of the best things you can do when a girl doesn’t respond to your text is to never panic or react in any way.
Don’t jump to conclusions or assume anything–even if she never responds. Ever.
- Don’t even think about why she’s not responding.
- Don’t check your phone constantly.
- Don’t analyze, stress, or worry whether you should send another message or not.
Definitely don’t do what most guys in this situation do. What’s that you ask? Well, most guys have this immediate reaction of pointing fingers and sending accusatory texts asking for a reason why she’s not texting back.
So don’t send any desperate message asking why she’s taking so long to respond.
These simple rules will help you get a handle on things so you don’t send her a message you’ll probably regret sending.
What to do instead
One of the best things you can do when girls don’t send a response is to take a step back. If your emotions are in a whirlpool and your mind is going out of control, doing this will help you calm down.
So if you don’t immediately hear back from the woman you like–wait a bit.
Give her enough time and space to respond before sending her another text message. In short, don’t text her again before she has had the chance to respond to your first message.
Because if you text her every few hours, you will seem like you got no life. And you’ll turn any woman off since it makes you seem desperate and oh so needy.
Instead of questioning everything you know about your relationship, give her the benefit of the doubt. No matter the reason, texting too soon doesn’t always guarantee a response.
So don’t send the girl another message too soon.
In the meantime, do something productive with your time. Hang out with your friends or talk to other girls.
Just move on for now.
Why is she not texting back?
Why is there no response from her?
You keep asking that question but do you really need to know?
The answer to that is, of course, no.
There can be many possible reasons you are not getting a response from her. But from time to time, I believe it’s okay to think she has been kidnapped by aliens and won’t be coming back for a while. Why?
Because when you’re not sure about anything, trying to find some meaning when a girl doesn’t text back is like trying to pound sand. You can only make a guess at this point anyway as to why your girl could go radio silent on you.
Since there are plenty of things that could keep a girl from her phone–you should stop thinking about it.
How long do I have to wait before I text her again?
If you haven’t had a good conversation with her, you don’t want to seem like you have nothing better to do other than sit there, look at your phone, and wait for her response all day.
That means you do not text her the same day.
For example, if you text a girl you recently met and don’t hear from her for a day, you can send her another message the next day.
If she still doesn’t respond, you can move on–or call her, then move on.
If you’re going to text her, you don’t want to wait too long. Why? Because if you wait too long, you’ll find that few girls will reach out to you on their own. And a lot of girls won’t re-initiate contact–even if she is interested.
However, once you’ve proven to her that you are neither desperate nor needy for her attention or validation, you can double text or triple text once in a while like when you urgently require a reply.
Here’s a good rule of thumb to follow: only put as much effort as she does.
Anyway, even if a number goes cold doesn’t mean it will remain cold a week or a month later… if you know how to reactivate cold numbers.
What do I text her?
So you’ve waited.
And the girl you like has yet to send any response from a previous text message you sent. What do you say in your text message?
But before I get to that, there’s something else you have to keep in mind.
When you text a girl again–after not hearing from her for a while–don’t ask her why she didn’t reply to your last text message.
Never get hung up on why she failed to respond. So don’t mention it, make fun of it, or ask questions about it. Don’t even bring it up. Even if it slips into the conversation, don’t make a big deal out of it.
Just be cool with it.
Don’t get all needy when a girl doesn’t return your texts.
And just move on to something else. Forget the last conversation and shift your focus on getting a new conversation started again and building a stronger connection with her.
If you’re going to send another text message after getting ignored, make sure your message stands out and gets her attention. [Read: Text messages that gets her attention]
Know the right text messages that attract women and you’ll have no problems with this.
Here are some ideas you can use:
Humor is one of the fastest ways to reengage a girl. So send her a concise, lighthearted message, so she feels great chatting with you over text. [Read: How to make her smile]
You can also make her feel good with unique, genuine compliments–not compliments meant for her and a hundred other women. So to avoid generic compliments, focus on details you like about her that make her one of a kind in your eyes.
However, indirect compliments might be more effective in getting a response. “I can’t get enough talking to you,” should make almost anyone feel pretty good.
I would, anyway.
You can also start an interesting conversation but, your choice of what to talk about is paramount. So get your girl talking about herself. Ask her about her favorite band. Then ask her for recommendations for a good album.
This way, you are taking an interest in her interests. And that makes it hard for her to resist not texting back.
If you already have a shared interest or mutual friends, you can start with that and branch out.
Read her responses and adjust accordingly. If she doesn’t seem to respond, don’t keep sending the same thing. That will likely annoy the heck out of her rather than encourage her to respond.
If nothing works, it can only mean one thing: you should move on.
Focus on someone else to connect with to cut your losses early.
Know when to walk away
It doesn’t feel good to be left hanging by the girl you like.
No one likes that because it sucks.
But not everyone is going to be into you. And that’s okay.
So don’t let a text that goes unanswered ruin your day. There could be as many reasons as you want why a girl doesn’t text back:
- Some girls text less than others.
- Some women have a lot going on.
- And some ladies don’t care.
But you don’t need to spend too much time analyzing or stressing about it.
And if she’s really ghosting you, move on.
Don’t waste time on her.
Remember: When a girl doesn’t respond, stop thinking about it and get on with your day. Reengage her some other time or flirt with other girls over text.
If you don’t have enough of other girls’ numbers saved on your phone–you should fix that. And fast.
Go out there, meet women, and ask for their numbers. [Read: How to ask a girl for her number]
You’ll find that having a surplus of high-value women in your life allows you to be unconcerned when a girl or two doesn’t text you back. You can get started today with this step-by-step guide to meeting and attracting women.
P.S. Don’t get attached to a future too early
Ever wonder why sometimes you get alarmed when a girl you’re interested in doesn’t respond to you? Or why your mind can go into panic mode and spin out of control when your message is left on ‘read’?
Well, when you like a girl a lot, things can get pretty serious in your head because you tend to psychologically invest so much in the future.
When you think she’s the one, you can get carried away with that thinking. And rather than understanding that she could simply be busy, you tend to jump to conclusions, make hasty assessments about why she is not responding, and do some pretty dumb things, damaging a potential relationship.
So when you start to get too anxious while you’re waiting for her to respond–you could be attaching too much to the outcome.
And if you feel anxious with every girl you like not responding to you, it could just be your insecurity taking you for a ride.
Do you know what a confident man would do when a girl doesn’t respond to his text message? Well, he’s not sitting at home staring at his phone eagerly waiting for a response from a girl he barely knows. He focuses on something else.
Since you’re able to make it this far…
Would you also like to know:
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- Avoid Completely Avoidable Mistakes That Ruin Your Text Game
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