You can take being comfortable around other people, making and enjoying the company of friends as slowly as you want.
In the next few minutes…
I’m going to tell you how to become more social using a few key ideas you’ll read below that will allow you to make friends and have fun in social settings, and of course, get women.
As you know, being social is at the core of meeting and attracting women.
You could even say it’s at the heart of a lot of things that make us human–including your life satisfaction.
After all, if you want to achieve something in your school or at work…
… if you want to get ahead in life and make something of yourself, you need to be able to handle social situations with ease.
You see, being social is a fundamental requirement in life for a simple reason:
Humans are social animals.
And it is also why most successful people view connections as more valuable than a diploma.
It is also the secret if you want to live a hundred and beyond. (1)
Life is just easier if you’re more social.
So if you want to get good meeting girls or live a long happy life, start becoming more social by reading the rest of this page.
Don’t worry if you’re quiet, shy, introverted, or easily get anxious in social situations, you can be more social.
You can make friends and get noticed.
You can even try to become a social butterfly who can talk to everyone at a party and mesmerize others with your captivating stories.
It all starts with…
Breaking Out of Your Comfort Zone
Becoming more social is a process.
It doesn’t happen overnight, in a week, or even months.
You need to take it step-by-step, one day at a time, making gradual and steady improvements, not seeking an instant change.
Start small and slowly go a step further.
Your small step could be as simple as regularly getting out more.
- It could be talking a bit more than just a simple ‘Hi’ and ‘Thanks’ when you’re buying something.
- It could be talking to random strangers you find on your way to school or work like the guy you’re sitting next to on the bus, your taxi or Uber driver, or the cute girl in front of you, asking what time it is or some other random question you find interesting.
- It could be when you’re with friends and you don’t know someone in the group, you’d find a way to talk to them and get to know them.
- It could be making your observations known with a friendly statement like ‘So many people here today!’ where all you need to do is match the situation you found yourself in.
Whatever your ‘small’ step may be, when you find it’s not challenging anymore, when you find it easier, that’s the time you take it further.
As long as you focus on making progress, becoming more social is just a matter of when.
And if you want to challenge yourself to have rock-solid confidence in most social situations, I suggest taking a look at The Collection of Confidence — a complete blueprint to develop your unshakable confidence.
it will show you how to take your confidence to the next level in just 5 simple steps using a foundation that has been tried, tested, and proven to build more confidence with women.
Anyway, I digress so let’s move on.
Expand Your Social Circle
If you want to be more social, you need a social life; and for you to have a social life, you’ll need more than just a couple of friends.
You need to surround yourself with a few social circles.
And social media doesn’t count.
Like I said before, you can take this slow by making one friend at a time from school or work. And once you’ve made a friend, a new door opens for you to meet their friends and their friend’s friend, and so on.
The key here is to not wait around. You want to proactively reach out.
Invite them on activities like going to a game, attending a concert, or a seeing move. You can also throw a party and encourage them to bring guests.
And when you’re invited, of course, you accept, especially if it’s a gathering where you don’t know anybody.
Just think of the people you can meet.
Or if you’re not ready for that kind of action, you can simply catch up with your old friends. Ask what’s keeping them busy these days or how their life is going.
Just keeping the communication with them open can open new windows of opportunities for you to be more social.
And if you want something that’s will make it easier for you to be social, it is this:
Find people similar to you.
It will be far easier to get to know them than someone you can’t relate to. All you have to do is find people in your area with the same interest.
You’ll have to look beyond the faces you see daily and a way you can do that is to join a club or pick a new hobby that requires you to be more social.
Do you know what else will make you more social just a tad easier? It is to…
Improve Your Communication Skills
If you want to be more social, you will want others to easily like you.
So the next course on the menu is to be likable. And what does a likable person do?
No, they don’t seek attention or try to impress others.
Do this: Picture someone you find extremely likable. They can be a known personality or someone you know personally. What do you notice about their actions and behavior?
Do you notice how they seem naturally social?
Well, it may seem like it but you’ll be surprised how much being likable is under your control. (2)
And if you want to be highly likable — and be more social, — some of the key behaviors you’ll want to show include being: (3)
- Positive and enthusiastic
… to name just a few. Exceptionally likable people are also fully engaged.
They listen fully and actively, ask follow-up and open-ended questions, avoid being distracted by their phone, and make you feel important.
They show interest and listen so avidly that make it seem like what you’re saying is the most interesting in the world.
Of course, if you want to start somewhere, start with a smile.
An honest smile.
A smile like that will open doors, windows, and wallets for you.
And, if you want to be approachable, an open body language will do the inviting for you. That means leaving your frown, crossed arms, and the corner of the room where they should be–where nobody can see them.
Go ahead. Wave, nod, and keep eye contact.
When you talk, have the confidence to say whatever is on your mind so that it comes out loud and clear; and so people can understand.
Be happy and excited about life.
Open up to others, and give them time to open up to you.
Immerse yourself fully in the conversation.
If the above seems like asking for a lot out of your right now, you’ll have to eventually start facing your inner qualms if you want to be a more social individual.
Embrace Your Fears
We all have fears.
You probably have some fears about being more social and these fears come from the negative things you tell yourself.
These negative thoughts will hold you back and continue to drag you and back you up in a little dark corner of your mind — if you don’t deal with them.
You don’t need to make any drastic moves to deal with them, just pay attention when some negative thoughts come up.
Pay attention. Be aware. Then let them go.
When you become aware, only then can you start making change happen to your thinking patterns and begin eliminating your limiting beliefs about yourself.
This will set you on a path to work on your deeper issue, which is not covered in this short piece.
However, if you can’t seem to ease up and relax when you want to be less shy, and you almost always question what you are going to say, the trick there is to focus externally.
Get out of your head
Avoid thinking about what could go wrong. Doing that will only make you more anxious and self-conscious.
Don’t make it hard on yourself. Stop thinking about negative thoughts.
To enjoy being with people, do not scrutinize your behavior or criticize yourself. This will only make it seem like you’re not paying attention to the interaction.
The truth is…
Most people don’t care
And they are less judgmental than you think.
They are so busy with their own lives and issues that they won’t care that you’re anxious about saying something you think would make you look bad.
And even if they notice, they won’t care about it since they’re far more concerned about themselves.
Remove this mental worry — which won’t materialize anyway — and you’ll be less nervous and more confident in expressing yourself.
Moreover, what’s the worst thing that can happen?
Hitting it off with everyone you meet is mere fantasy. Not everyone you meet is going to like you. But that doesn’t mean you can’t try.
With all the people you meet, even when some people don’t want to be social with you, some certainly will.
So don’t let setbacks discourage you, no matter what.
That is how you become more social.
The One Thing You Can Do Now
To become more social, you’ll need to put yourself out there so you can meet someone to include in your life. (4)
It means being OK with failing at socializing.
It means letting yourself be uncomfortable.
It means being present in every interaction and focusing on who’s in front of you.
And the one thing you can do to put yourself out there is to take every opportunity you have to become less shy and more social.
Make time and hang out with others a few times a week. Know your coworkers and your peers. Attend social events with your family.
Be social daily and make a new friend wherever your feet take you.
Becoming more social is possible to anyone — even if you’re a shy and quiet introvert. It just takes practice and mental work. However, you also need to …
Believe You Can Be Social
You have to believe; otherwise, it will never happen. Why? Because when you believe something can be done, your mind will find ways to do it.
Avoid referring to yourself as shy, introvert, or anti-social because that will only reinforce the belief that you’re incapable of being more social.
Believe in yourself that you can become more social.
If you have minimal understanding of social norms, take some time to observe and listen. Ask questions to your socially-savvy friends — or pick a book about social dynamics.
And once you start to understand these norms, you’ll be more comfortable around other people and have the confidence to be more outgoing, say what you think and express your feelings freely.
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