‘Hi’, as you know, is not the most exciting way to start a conversation with a woman over text.
Usually, it doesn’t trigger anything more exciting than another… ‘Hey.’
It is so common and overused, that people use it without giving it much thought.
On its own, it is a lazy way to start a text conversation that can leave you guessing.
Since it does not provide you with anything else for a conversation to continue, it can even leave you confused — if not troubled — about how to respond to such a message. And so you tend to go with the default.
While there are many text messages you could send to get her attention other than ‘hi’…
What if a girl texts you for the first time, and her message is … ‘Hi’, ‘Hey’, or something similarly bland or lazy? How do you respond? And…
What does it mean when a girl texts you ‘hi’
Maybe she kind of likes you.
And wants to start a conversation with you but she doesn’t know what to say.
Perhaps she is shy and not great at starting conversations.
Or maybe she has no romantic feelings for you. She’s just being nice and wants to be friends.
She wants to keep in touch.
She could also be feeling bored and lonely. She doesn’t have anything going on and wants some of your attention.
Sure, you could keep on pondering but what it means will only become clear if she sends you another text message.
In short, don’t jump to conclusions based on just that one text message. Especially if it’s just a ‘Hi’ and nothing else.
You don’t know what she really wants except she’s putting her hand up and waiting to see how you respond.
The good news is this:
Since she started the text conversation, motivating her to reply should not be that hard. But if you want her to reply to you again and again, now that is the challenge!
if you don’t get any other message after a while…
Take the initiative
If the girl isn’t a great texter and ‘Hi’ is her way of initiating conversations, she wants you to do all the heavy lifting.
Since she’s letting you take charge, take the lead.
Rather than going with the flow and waiting for her to continue, take the initiative and set up a fun conversation.
Most guys will pass the ball back and let her figure out how to continue the conversation. But you can do better than them and stand out.
And since she doesn’t seem to know where to go, you can take the conversation wherever you want.
Just don’t lead the interaction to boredom. That’s the one place you don’t want to be caught in.
Don’t lead to boredom
If you are texting a girl you would like to spend time with, you want to give her a taste of what it is like to hang out with you.
You want to ensure it never gets boring early in the conversation so you can keep her interested.
After all, boredom does not help her desire for more of your company. Why? Because when an attractive girl gets bored, you lose her attention and all your chances of meeting up with her.
So if you like this girl and would like to meet up with her, don’t send her predictable responses. As you know, predictable responses do not create anticipation and curiosity. They do not make her eager to explore more about you.
For example, after you get a hi from her, what’s a predictable straightforward response?
- “What’s up?”
- “How are you?”
- “What are you up to?”
- “How it’s going?”
Sure, these are fine responses to her “Hi”. It’s like waving back when someone waves at you from a distance.
But if you want to STAND OUT from other guys on her phone you want to be less lame. You want to keep the conversation fun, so she doesn’t lose interest in spending time with you.
And if you want to win her over after she sends you ‘hi’, but you are at a loss for words, here are various…
Ways to respond to a ‘hi’ from a girl
There are many creative and engaging ways to respond to a girl reaching out through text with a “Hi”.
My least favorite is a friendly greeting mirroring her ‘hi’:
- “Hi! What’s up?”
- “Hey! How are you doing?”
- “Hey! How’s your day going?”
- “Hi there! What have you been up to?”
Your response can set the tone for the conversation. How about showing a little interest and excitement in your response?
- “Well, if this isn’t …”
- “I knew you’d drop a ‘hi’ sooner or later. What took you so long?”
- “Anything exciting happening?”
- “I was just thinking about you.”
- “I’ve been expecting you.”
- “What took you so long to say hi?”
- “Perfect timing, I was just thinking about messaging you!”
Of course, you can also show a little curiosity about why you’re getting a ‘hi’ from her.
- • “I feel like this ‘hi’ holds a mystery. What’s the story behind it?”
- • “Your ‘hi’ intrigues me. Anything interesting that happened to you recently?”
Want to start a conversation? How about asking relevant questions? If you know something about her, ask about that so your response is not so “generic.”
- “Hi! Did you catch the game last night?”
- “Hey! Have you seen that new movie everyone’s talking about?”
There is a topic any girl would love to hear what you think about. That topic is her. So ask her a question related to her profile, a conversation you had before, and other things related to her.
- “Do you know what I find fascinating about [her/her job/etc]?”
- “I saw something today that reminded me of you. Wanna hear about it?”
Remember that open-ended questions can keep the conversation more engaging.
If you want to go straight for the close, why not?
- “Any exciting plans for the weekend?”
When you get a ‘hi’ message from a girl, you can reply with anything, really.
It’s an invitation to start a conversation. And it’s up to you to take it or not.
You can be playful, teasing, silly, or flirty, depending on the context and nature of your relationship with her.
Keep that in mind if you don’t want to keep the interaction too nice or too friendly, and you want to tease her about something.
- “Should I be nervous or excited about this conversation?”
- “What mischief are you up to?”
- “You beat me to it! What’s on your mind?”
If you want to get the girl to put in a little more effort, you can also…
Trigger her chase reflex!
If you want to make a girl chase you a little, the key to that is to make her feel that she may not be able to get you.
How do you accomplish that? Have the attitude that says you’re not at all convinced you’d get along. It’s also important that you don’t behave in a way you think she will like. Rather be who you really are.
if it suits your style a funny remark works wonders.
Your funny responses to her ‘hi’ can make her laugh and brighten her day.
So show off your sense of humor and shake up the conversation with something hilarious.
- “You had me at ‘hi’”
- “I think ‘hi’ is the nicest thing anyone’s said to me all day.”
You can even go with a pun or joke.
- “Did you hear about the kidnapping at the park? Don’t worry, the kid woke up! 😄 How’s your day going?”
- “How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together! How’s everything on your end?”
Remember, you can be creative, unpredictable, and playful, even flirty when you come up with your responses.
Just be sure to respond with enthusiasm and keep the conversation flowing.
Whether you met her in real life and got her number, matched her on some app, or chatted with her on social, always consider her personality and the context of your relationship when you are texting with a girl.
If a ‘hi’ from a girl leaves you confused about what she wants, don’t makeup dream scenarios in your head. Maybe she doesn’t know exactly what she wants so don’t get your mind jumbled with thoughts with no concrete answers.
She could want some of your attention. She could even be interested. But on the other hand, ‘Hi’ is low effort and she might not be that interested. So don’t assume anything with just a ‘hi’ which leaves the purpose of the conversation in the air.
And since ‘hi’ is as low effort as it can get in starting a text conversation, you can of course get her to try a little harder by having a take it or leave it attitude. If a girl is giving you a basement-level investment with her texting, you could do the same. Or you don’t have to respond.
Here are some more things to keep in mind:
Prompt her to keep talking. She might just want to say a quick hello or have something important to say. Invites her to share more.
Speak your mind. Show you have standards while keeping it interesting and respectful.
Keep it simple. There are only two kinds of texts you need to keep in mind. The wrong kind of text does nothing while the right kind of text gets things moving along. So you want to always send the girl you like the right kind of text I describe here.
Like this line from Race:
- “You should stop daydreaming about me and get back to …”
There’s more where that came from. If you want a boatload of text examples you can steal and copy right now to spike a girl’s attraction for you…
- 8 Mistakes to Avoid When Complimenting a Girl Over Text - January 29, 2024
- How to Respond When a Girl Texts ‘Hi’ - January 2, 2024
- How to Practice Talking to Women If You’re Shy - October 5, 2023